ON THE OTHER SIDE OF FEAR IS YOUR GREATEST EXPANSION

If you’re familiar with MTV’s The Challenge, you already have a sense of what I’m hinting at with this blog title. For 40 seasons, competitors have shown up to the unknown. They walk in without knowing the theme of their season, whether they'll work in teams or with their worst enemy and the challenge format can shift from episode to episode. It's only the night before that they get a cryptic clue from the legendary host, TJ Lavin, about what’s coming next.

Last month, I arrived in Cazadero, California with 40 strangers, mountains, hills and zero hints at what challenges lay ahead. Oh… and Emily Schromm as our very own TJ. Our first clue came the night before via Telegram: a video from Emily saying the next day’s challenge would be individual. She told us to wear our grippiest shoes, long sleeves, and pants. It was about to get dirty.

Although my lungs were in one of their worst states ever (see my newsletter, “From Asthma Attacks to Heart Medicine”), I was pumped. I’d dreamed of being on The Challenge and here was my shot—served to me on a gold platter—and I felt like absolute shit. That night, I set an intention to let go of my ego. I promised myself I’d listen to my body and do the best I could, whatever the circumstances. This wasn’t about winning; it was about showing up.

I woke up early to plunge into the mermaid pool. Yup, that is an actual sentence I get to write and an experience I got to have. After grabbing coffee, I headed down to the temple for morning breathwork. I sent my lungs every bit of energy, healing and intention I could. Then I packed up my EmPack. It was go time.

We gathered in the driveway promptly at 9 AM. Emily gave my lungs a little love with a tuning fork—one last dose of support. We warmed up and were suddenly instructed to quickly and strategically pick a partner. Gahhhhh, I hate those schoolyard-pick scenarios. By the time I turned around, most people had already paired up. I scanned the driveway and found Maria, a woman from New Jersey who had never seen The Challenge, but was a longtime fan of Emily. 

We lined up in pairs and followed Emily and Tori into a part of the property we hadn’t seen yet. We arrived at what I can only describe as my version of heaven: rolling green mountains and a valley opening into what looked like a movie set—an obstacle course playground just waiting to be conquered.

In true Challenge fashion, we got a twist: Tori told us to take a good look at our partners because now… they were our opponents. We’d be racing against them.

My partner and I were second in line. There wasn’t much time to think or watch others go first (Challenge tip 101: never go first). I was nervous, but remembered my promise. No ego. Just presence and my best effort in the condition I was in.

I made it through every obstacle pretty smoothly. Thank gosh because repeating anything over and over probably would’ve triggered my asthma to act up. I didn’t exactly fly like Superwoman, but I did it. And I had a blast.

My recreation of the Obstacle Course Challenge via my ReMarkable.

We spent the next few hours on the side of a mountain, watching our newfound friends navigate balance beams, climbing ropes, lava rocks, scaling walls and sprinting to the finish. It was pure joy—soaking up the sun with my fellow Spartan women.

On the downside, there were two injuries. One stopped us all in our tracks—our dear Rachel hurt her ankle badly. The second we didn’t even know about until the next day. Kiana had pushed through the course with adrenaline, but showed up the next morning in a boot and on crutches. The wild women of Teravana were on full display.

The photos from that day say it all: tenacity, joy, accomplishment. I watched women dominate some obstacles and struggle with others. I also made this hype video that shows our Challenge clue from Emily to highlights from the course. Sisters ran nearly side by side while we yelled, “Are you going to let her beat you?!” Women faced sections thinking, “No way in hell”—only to conquer literal and metaphorical walls. Moms in beast mode. Former track stars slicing through mud like nothing. A try-again mindset, cheering, celebrating, lifting each other up. The facilitators were phenomenal—pushing us, managing logistics and unfortunate injuries, and making sure everyone felt victorious in their own way. 

After the challenge, we went back to the house to cool down in the mermaid pool, change and regroup. We did a meditation with Tori, who’s currently training as a facilitator. I journaled like crazy—which is one of my favorite parts of escaping my daily life: all that space to reflect and write. I downloaded a new Calcudoku puzzle (which is sudoku with math) to my ReMarkable and cocooned in a hammock out back to work on it. Dinner was glazed carrots, greens and homemade sausage from the animals on the properties farm. We ended the night with a sound bath in the temple.

Kimberly Cole of Spiritual Healing Haven facilitated the sound bath and while I’ve done many sound baths before, I had never heard one of the instruments she used.. an ocean drum. It was unreal—the sound felt like I was inside crashing waves without getting wet. I had to take off my eye mask to see how she was making that magic. Is there anything better than experiencing a sound bath and moving two feet into bed to drift off into deep sleep for the night? This is camp—Emily’s version.

I want to end by sharing Kimberly’s story, because she mentioned my favorite word in her Instagram caption recap: fear.

She saw Emily post about the retreat back in November and knew she wanted to be there, offering her healing work. A fan of The Challenge from the start, she’s always admired how contestants show up and face… themselves and their fear. She stepped outside her comfort zone and DMed Emily—thinking she might never hear back. And yet… she booked the gig.

Her story is the best kind of reminder and a lesson I’ve found to be true over and over again: the universe responds when you put yourself out there.

Kimberly shared that she felt energetic shifts in the months leading up to the retreat. She showed up just like the rest of us—knowing no one, being open and vulnerable—and left transformed.

The way she began her caption is the perfect note to end this blog on… on the other side of fear is your greatest expansion.

If you want to experience the magic I did, scroll below for a discount code to Emily’s upcoming fall retreat.